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Womens Sheer Nylon Stockings
by Marilyn Conner
I noticed an ad in the latest issue of Vogue. It was touting sheer nylon stockings for women. It took a few minutes for my mind to absorb it--women don't wear nylons anymore, unless, you're a beautiful model on the pages of Vogue. If you do, be forewarned, do not wear with sandals.
No doubt most women are like me. They have a drawer full of stockings. They think they have one perfect pair of nylons for an emergency. Until faced with the dilemma, where in the hell is that perfect pair I bought - was it last winter?
Those stocking thoughts brought back the memory of the Absolut Vodka King and my own nylons story. His name escapes me, but he was foreign and we were scheduled to meet in his hotel suite (my first mistake) for a quick interview before he headed to the airport. He was in town to promote his newly named Absolut artist. I was excited because I knew the artist and thought it was tres cool. Furthermore, Absolut had been successful (maybe the first) to advertise 'cool' in the 90's. They brought attention to contemporary art and artists, designer vodkas, sidewalk cafes and Miami.
What I remember best about Mr. Absolut was his hangover and the distinct smell of sour alcohol and aftershave. Inside the suite, there were scattered vodka bottles, empty and half-full and, he was definitely in a foul mood.
I tried to steer him around the subject of art, Absolut artists, the campaign, future plans, his background, his history with Absolut. He was no game. I struggled with each question as he stared at me with a WTF look. In other words, why are you here? I was feeling inadequate, nervous and an idiot.
Fresh pastries and coffee were delivered after I arrived. I had coffee and a French pastry with chocolate filling. He had nothing but coffee and glared at me.
As I fumbled, with absolut-ly no help from him, I finally hit on a question that brought him into the moment. He honed in on his favorite Absolut art which was nylon stockings designed by a female artist in New York. With that seque he was off telling me about the gloves she designed and suddenly reached into his briefcase and handed me a pair of Absolut Vodka, logo embossed, nylon stockings.
I do not know where those stockings are at this point in my life. Many times I have wondered about that sorry little man. Shortly after the interview his name was not associated with the ads, the ads dried up, and next thing I knew designer alcohol became the rage. But it wasn't Absolut, it was every other brand in the world.
While there aren't many perks to owning an art magazine, there are perks to entering a strange man's hotel suite: one must be female, semi-unexperienced, and brazen, to endure an unsavory situation, to leave with a new pair of white stockings embossed with the Absolut logo. I have such vital memories. There's a reason I don't wear stockings anymore. I don't have a pair without a hole or a run and I can't find those darn Absolut ones, which are still in the package--and perfect. I'm absolutely sure of that.
About the Author
Mary Conner is a freelance writer on women's fashion, with a passion for womens lingerie, intimates and fine intimate apparel. For more information on lingerie, please visit pamperedpassions.com.
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